Surprise Package

There were two packages waiting for me when I came home this past Friday. It was strange, there was a feeling of deja vu when I saw the boxes. For some reason, a sense of dread came over me. I immediately assumed it was a wedding present. Wedding presents are fun, why should this make me suspicious? Perhaps it was the "his end up, fragile" marking on the box.

Well, I took the boxes inside an opened them. This is what I saw...

It's a lamp! A lamp isn't bad, we even have a couple on the registry. I'll open the other box...

Oh dear...

Neil Patrick Harris

So, I named my fantasy football team after Neil Patrick Harris this week. I sent him some fan mail telling him that he was the inspiration behind this week's lineup and I got a response back! His people wanted to set up an interview via chat room so he could give me some advice on setting my lineup. Here is the chat room...

http://www.whatwouldnphdo.com/

Here is how the interview went...

Me: Neil, it is such an honor to have you here, are you excited?

Neil: Probably

Me: So, ESPN is projecting Reggie Bush to have a big game. Do you think he can score 33 fantasy football points?

Neil: Go ask your parents, they are wiser than you think.

Me: Sounds like good advice. Do you like unicorns?

Neil: The answer is inside you. Specifically inside your pancreas.

Me: That's a little weird. I have the Ravens defense and the Bucs defense. Should I start the Bucs this week?

Neil: This question bores me, ask me something else.

Me: I thought you wanted to give me advice, you are not being very polite. I think this interview is over.

As you can see, things didn't go as well as I had hoped. Maybe he was having a bad day or something.

Predictions about Dan's Bachelor Party

I just thought I would put these up here so I can amaze everyone when I am dead on...

- people will get hung over on Friday night and not be too interested in driving on Saturday

- people will get hung over on Saturday and hate driving back Sunday

- someone will get a speeding ticket

- less than 10 words will be spoken to women

- Steve will be late

Abandoned

So, I have been completely abandoned. It is the bachelor party. It has taken all week to prepare for and it will take all weekend to celebrate. I have spent my evenings alone with Nana this week. This wouldn't be so bad but Nana has totally made me her bitch. She gives me these sad little puppy eyes and then I have to pet her or play with her. Then, I try to leave and go do something but she gives me the sad look again. I can't get anything done without Dan around to distract her.

Death by Chipotle

All I have to say, is I am never eating Cipotle again. These portions are unreasonable. I think I may need to take the rest of the day off.

Wedding Hair?

So, I am in the process of trying to find someone to do my hair for the wedding which is kind of stressful, mostly because our wedding is so early that a lot of places aren't open early enough. I was looking around and the closest salon to the wedding location is run by Barry Flecther.

Berry Flecther has an impressive resume. He has done hair for Mya, Toni Braxton, Chaka Khan, Mary J. Blidge and Tina Turner. The Tina Turner thing worries me a little (see pic).

Also, it is important to note that he has competed in the hair olympics.


However, this isn't the most impressive item on his resume. He has personally done the hair for the one, the only... Prince. This is what Dan said when I told him this. "i will pee myself if you get your hair done by someone who did Prince's hair".

Grendel

So, I am staying home today and am watching Grendel, the SciFi version of Beowulf. I feel as though I am getting all the culture associated with reading Beowulf AND some sweet acting and special effects.

Let me quote to you what I just heard in the movie. "The monster kept coming... (long dramatic pause), and coming (longer dramatic pause).... and coming (okay, they are going to quit, this pause is sooo long) ...

..

..

and coming."

That was seriously intense. This is one persistant monster!